Age, lost years? depression mentionIt's weird everytime I get reminded that I am actually 34 years old. I don't feel like it at all. Maybe it's the lost years of depression I had that are a pretty big blur and even have pretty little memory tbh. It feels like I'm missing years and the memory doesn't align with my age. Also I feel like I'm not where I'm supposed to be with 34. I feel really behind and not good enough. It's weird.
Age, lost years? depression mention@kitten That's also a thing... I can't actually really put my finger on it. It feels like things are missing and I don't know exactly what? Just something and the feeling is definitely strongly there.
Maybe just memories? It's weird because it's not like missing memories from when I was a baby before you start to properly remember things which I guess is relatively common. But more like I have memories from my childhood and teens before and then memories again after the depression. But there are a few years that feel like they are heavily blurred out and a gaping hole with barely any memory. Some maybe suppressed, others just maybe because I actually didn't even do anything and just withered along during that time.
And life is a big collection of memories, maybe that hole is what makes it wrong? Or that I feel I should have grown with experience and memories but they're lacking now?
Half jokingly, Age, lost years? depression mention@kitten You know, thinking about it... I'm definitely prime candidate for being a Cylon with the missing memory and blur from my depression... If the machines ever take over you might wanna keep eyes on me
Age, lost years? depression mention@AliciaBytes I don't really think I have much to answer... but I guess, if you're now in a position to create new memories that actually matter... that's the way to go anyway
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