discussing kinky dynamics
internalizing that people who take dominant positions in kink do so because they like it feels like an important step in learning to be someone nice and comfortable to play with.if one approaches D/s as something the dominant side does for the submissive, it's easy to forget that there has to be something in it for them too, that they are also seeking something they desire. there might be things they do specifically for the sub's enjoyment (and maybe enjoy themselves because of that), but they still have their own desires that are equally important to address, and to do it as something for them.
I submit because it is something I desire, but when I offer that to someone, I do it knowing that that someone seeks control, power, trust, inflicting pain, whatever specific thing they enjoy about it. not because I think they're doing me a favor.